Skip to content


All work and all play (Writing: Day 3)

Isn’t it terrible that work and play duel for my attention?

It’ great that work feels like playing, but still…

I feel like a teenager writing HTML in the middle of the night again.

Posted in Writing Challenges and Prompts.


Not washing the dishes to wash the dishes (Writing: Day 2)

One of my favourite things about washing up is that whenever it starts to annoy me that there’s a pile of it; I can just wash it all and it doesn’t annoy me any more!

One of my favourite things about living with one other person, who is compatibly similar in cleanliness fastidious, is that it’s rare that piles of washing up amass to annoy me.

🙂

Posted in Writing Challenges and Prompts.

Tagged with , .


Who and why am I? (Writing: Day 1)

I set myself the joyful task of writing daily and I’ve realised that perhaps the way to ensure I do it, is to publish my efforts. So, here I am…

One..Who am I?
Queer. Black. Queer. Writer. Artist. Digital & web geek. Introvert. Dancer. Singer. Philosopher. Vegan baker.

Two..Why am I here?
To inspiring, nurture, support, build, create, share, enjoy self-love for people of colour who are queer and/or women.

Three..What do I need to do?
Look after myself. Write. Create community. Get online. Introvert time. Introspection. Hang out with queer people of colour and women of colour. Prioritise self-care. Eject harmful influences in my life. Reject stuff and people who are bad for me. Learn. Educate myself. Nest. Listen to music. Shake it. Be creative. Become more assertive and confident. Keep listening to my people. Go for walks.

Action list

  1. Decide what needs to be achieved.
  2. Break it down into manageable chunks of work.
  3. Set priorities on a daily, weekly and monthly basis.
  4. Take actions. In between the actions, allow time for relaxing, taking exercise and pursuing a few hobbies (mine is, cooking, watching movies, walking and photography!).
  5. Take planned actions.
  6. Review your plans regularly and take corrective actions when needed. Remain optimistic. Think deliberately about positive things which are already happening in your life.
  7. Enjoy the results. Share them, at least with people who are close to you! The more you share your success, the more abundance you will see and attract.

“Don’t despair if things take longer or you make mistakes. Be yourself. Learn from your experience.”

– Questions, action list items and quotation from Time Management and Purpose Management (HDA Training)

Posted in Writing Challenges and Prompts.

Tagged with , .


Procrastination be gone

Collage of words about asexuality and aromanticism, layered over a background of a stylish bath in a candlelit room

I watched Xena the Warrior Princess until I could watch no more and when I finally ran out of all the other procrastination activities, I tidied my room.

…and now, there is nothing left but to write.

So, at last, I get straight on to…

Tidying my room again.

Ah well.

On the plus side, I’ve made art two weekends in a row. 🙂

[Image:

A photograph (grainy, low-quality and taken at an angle) of a collage of mostly words, on an A3 sheet of glossy paper (a photograph cut from a magazine). The paper has a black background. In the foreground (bottom-left) an expensive white bath, with two white candles, lit, on the floor beside it. It loosk really luxurious.

The pieces of text on top of the background are torn from magazines, generally two phrases clearly from different contexts are joined together. They say:

THERE’S ALWAYS ONE
me

FALLING IN LOVE?
BREAK YOUR HABITS

ME

We need to be wild – and I don’t mean
DATING

Get hands
OFF.

Underneath the A3 sheet, on a yellow A4 sheet of matte paper, handwritten, it says:

decolonise THIS.

“decolonise” is in a script/cursive style and “THIS” is in block text, but stylised to be a bit rounded too.

The two sheets of paper are framed by a purple scarf and the whole thing is clipped on to a black clothes hanger, which is hanging from a wooden picture rail on a wall painted white.

Posted in Musings.

Tagged with , , , .


Queer Zine Fest London 2012, one word… awesome!

Zinesters Do It On The Photocopier

[Image: A photograph of a dark-skinned hand holding a green sticker with the slogan: “Zinesters Do It On The Photocopier” and the name and URL for The Queer Zine Archive Project] I got this sticker free, whee!

I had an amazing time at Queer Zine Fest London 2012 yesterday. I woke up today intending to have hot chocolate for breakfast, get really excited filling in my spreadsheet of what I traded/sold and write-up the zine fest, and I did have a hot chocolate, and I totally got excited filling in my spreadsheet, but then I spent all day reading zines; and not even the ones I swapped/bought. I’ve been online all day, ostensibly writing this up, but actually just clicking links and reading the entire internet, practically.

Oh, where does the time go?

Anyway, here’s some rambling, yay!

I was really ill-prepared for this festival because I procrastinated loads over re-printing/photocopying my zine – my layout kind of makes it a pain – so I didn’t do that until the preceding Thursday, and then I was working for 12 hours on the Friday and suddenly it’s Saturday already.

So, I spent a lot of time sewing pages together at the fair. Which was pretty cool. I forgot that I like doing crafty things at the table. Next time I hope I remember to bring knitting or some such. (Because I intend to be much better prepared next time).

Also, it was quite a small festival, but I was there from 11.30am until 7pm and I still didn’t get to all the tables or eat any vegan cake. Wtf?! So, yeah, packed full of queers and their zines. Happy happy me. 🙂

I’m pretty introverted most of the time, except at things like that, so I was super-bouncy and squeeing a lot.

I am really bad at initiating things; thankfully, I scribbled a note – “I DO SWAPS TOO. =)” – and a bunch of people came over and asked if we could swaps zines, and I said yes. Amazeballs!

Here are links to people with whom I traded zines:

  • Sarah Tea-Rex: Graduating into Unemployment (Yorkshire/Sussex, 2011) & I Am Not The Rain (I’m totally fangirling you Sarah and I’m not even a girl. Hurray for the Mutual Appreciation Society!)
  • A-K Pirata (Princess Pirata): Spellbook for Reckless Children & Drifting Clouds (2012)
  • Sergi Jimenéz: Who is John Trouble (London, 2012)
  • Jason (I think, but we didn’t introduce ourselves to each other and I have a terrible memory for faces, gah!): Mark ‘n’ Jason Summer Annual 2001
  • Sophie Mayer: Binders Full of Women (2012)
  • Stephanie Chan: Foreigner Go Home With Me (2012)
  • Pilar Awa Owl: Myth Story of a Healing Journey (2011)
  • Yas Lorentz: Terrible Triad (London, 2012)
  • Chella Quint: Adventures in Menstruating #6 (Sheffield, 2011)

…and I didn’t actually just buy any zines. Which is a first for me, I think. Whoa. Sabba was right when she said that swapping is the way to go. Which reminds me, Sabba, I totally owe you an email.

Pilar and I shared a table with Sophie Mayer (co-editor of Binders Full of Women), which was awesome – thanks for being fab tablees peeps!

I met/bumped into a bunch of awesome people (including all the above). It was all pretty awesome.

I’m tired, but inspired and invigorated, and I’m looking forward to when some of the seasonal-busy-ness is over and
I can curl up on a sofa with a mug of hot chocolate (er, yes, there’s a theme) and a pile of zines.

Bliss.

Some other people I saw/met briefly and wished I’d had more time:

  • Charlotte Richardson Andrews; you did a totes awesome job organising!
  • I met manouk at the end of the day, who had a stunningly beautiful stall – riotmade with love
  • I saw and meant to go back to a stall that had The Most Positive & Uplifiting & Empowering messages on it, and now I can’t remember who/what it was (gah! same side of the room as Princesa Pirata, and on the same table as Cartoon Kate)
  • I meant to trade for Morgenmuffel issues 2-12, but I was too slow and it sold out before I got back. *Clicks link* OMG it’s online, INSTANT JOY!
  • I caught sight of Will of Z is for Zines a few times. But I was too shy to say hello. (Doh!)
  • Stumbling around links to zinesters today, I wish I’d met Mister Briscoe
  • Following links online, I’ve just spent ages reading Kate Evans (cartoon Kate)’s thefoodoflove.org blog; I love it! Kate gave me a couple of awesome photos, including this one:

Dear Pete, yes. ...I am a clit-lickin lesbo and PROUD.

Caption: “Dear Pete, yes. …I am a clit-lickin lesbo and PROUD”, a free photo of a subvert (subverted advertisement); thanks Kate!

<3

 

Posted in Stuff about Zines.


So, people are actually buying and reading my zine, eh?!

Probably it’s not very interesting for people to read my “I sold/swapped a couple of zines” micro-updates, but it’s really exciting for me that people are actually paying to read stuff I’ve written and look at my artwork.

*Mind boggles*

As I said to a distro friend; I’m seriously stoked.

Read / buy Unsewing My Lips: You can read it online for free or buy a hard copy.

Posted in Stuff about Zines.


Birmingham Zine Festival, Anarchist Bookfair, London Queer Zine Festival… 2012

Past. Present. Future.

I was at the Birmingham Zine Festival on 13 October 2012; three zines sold! (one the day before, one on the day and one swapped for Ripping Out the Wale, an excellent zine by Sophie Powell). Exciting – my first sales!

I won’t be at the “anarchist?” bookfair (yay!) on 27 October 2012, but hopefully my zines will be; dropping them off early tomorrow. Meanwhile, I’ll be selling vegan goodies at a pop-up stall near Canning Town station.

And I’ll be at the Queer Zine Fest London on 8 December 2012; hopefully with a new zine! (Excited!) Still waiting to hear what tables cost.

Phew!

Posted in Stuff about Zines.


Girls get busy… squeeing all the way at the zine fair

Yesterday, I was at the Girls Get Busy zine fair, predictably it was very white, but I still had ace times. 🙂

And I bought the most amazing zine ever! It’s called My Electronic Life and the cover is “a lasercut replica of a real motherboard” – definitely appealing to my not-so-inner geek. Squee!

I spent most of my time at the Walrus Zine stall, nattering with Sabba and Sofia. <3

I got:

I wish I had:

No prizes for guessing who my favourite zinestar is at the moment… 🙂 I was sad to miss out on a copy of Bob the Goldfish, but I got to read the original and was repeatedly gasping in awe: The illustration is incredible and the words are beautiful; lovely example of the awesomeness of collaboration.

…and it seems my fangirling’s just going to go on, if I let it; so I’ll end there!

I was so inspired by the experience that I’ve been scribbling ideas for zines ever since. 😀

Speaking of which, technology is trying to stop me from getting my zine Unsewing My Lips online, but I shall triumph. Eventually.

Edit: Unsewing My Lips is now online. 🙂

Posted in Stuff about Zines.


Self care: It is time for drastic action, now!

Taking onboard everything in these guides would be really beneficial to me.

I struggle.

Since last week I’ve been making renewed efforts towards self care and recovering from burnout, but I find it difficult to do all the healthful things at the same time.

In time, in time…

Here are some key gems (edited for brevity):

When you’re burned out, the natural tendency is to protect what little energy you have left by isolating yourself. But your friends and family are more important than ever during difficult times. Turn to your loved ones for support.

When you’ve reached the end stage of burnout, adjusting your attitude or looking after your health isn’t going to solve the problem. You need to force yourself to slow down or take a break. Cut back whatever commitments and activities you can. Give yourself time to rest, reflect, and heal.

Burnout brings with it many losses… It takes a tremendous amount of emotional control to keep yourself from feeling the pain of these losses.

  • Loss of the idealism or dream with which you entered your career
  • Loss of the role or identity that originally came with your job
  • Loss of physical and emotional energy
  • Loss of friends, fun, and sense of community
  • Loss of esteem, self-worth, and sense of control and mastery
  • Loss of joy, meaning and purpose that make work – and life – worthwhile

When you recognize these losses and allow yourself to grieve them, you open yourself to healing.

  • Accept reality.
  • Don’t beat yourself up.
  • Surrounding yourself with positive, supportive family and friends may better help your self-esteem than hiding away.
  • Let people know that you’re looking for work.  Taking action will help you feel more in control of your situation. Plus, the support you receive may pleasantly surprise you. Simple words of sympathy and encouragement can be a huge boost.
  • Join or start a job club. Being around other job seekers can be energizing and motivating, and help keep you on track during your job search.

And finally, basics of self care…

  • Exercise regularly. At least 30 minutes of exercise, three times weekly, because exercise is one of the best ways to relieve stress and boost your energy. So get moving, even if you’re tired.
  • Eat right. Keep your energy up and your mind clear by eating nutritious meals at regular times throughout the day, because nourished bodies are better prepared to cope with stress and get through busy days.
  • Get enough sleep. An average of 8 hours of solid, uninterrupted sleep every night, because otherwise energy level, productivity, and ability to handle stress will suffer.

Posted in Musings.


Reflections: a study of self, before

I’m writing an article about courage as part of my focus on matters of the heart.

listen to your heart

“The human heart is so delicate and sensitive that it always needs some tangible encouragement to prevent it from faltering in its labor. The human heart is so robust, so tough, that once encouraged it beats its own rhythm with a loud unswerving consistency. One thing that encourages the heart is music.”

– Maya Angelou: Letter to My Daughter, p85

Listening to voice diaries from August 2009, I’m falling in love with myself again. Somehow re-reading my past diaries, I get exasperated with myself and cringe; but listening to them, I feel compassion and gentleness. Maybe I’ll record myself more. Maybe I’ll put excerpts on Soundcloud…!

I’m listening to my ramblings about past relationships and finding it intriguing how much my ideas have changed about so many things. Wondering if I’ll learn something from my past self that will give me some insight I can use in my zine about queer asexuality.

I’m doing lots of looking at the past – looking at websites I’ve made, reading poems I’ve written, and listening to my voice.

Reflections. Formless. Rambling. Musings. Why?

Posted in Musings.